Grey
by Phoenyxx
Summary: Kakashi tries to impart wisdom and live. Sakura is learning so much more about the man that she once upon a time called sensei.


**Grey**

**Warning:** _**SPOILERS**_ to the latest manga chapters. No pairings. Introspective.

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Naruto.

--

It was the second day of his awakening.

She read the makeshift medical chart, clinical to a fault. Even removed, the red words strung together on the piece of paper seemed to wrap around her throat and choke her.

'Chakra system damage - _irreparable_. Note: patient can never access chakra again or will die from strain, resulting heart failure or stroke. Second note: lifestyle councillor.'

A resounding, violent _CRACK_.

She forced her fingers to slack around the stationary board, splinters of wood falling to the ground. Her careful eyes traced the words and the implications behind the statements…_Irreparable damage. Psyche evaluation._

'Patient must terminate current occupation.'

_No longer shinobi._ Wetting her lips, she pressed them together firmly to prevent the trembling.

'Third note: with guidance of the Hyuuga elders, Sharingan removal will be scheduled.'

She hissed under her breath but grudgingly understood the logic behind the idea. Despaired, her eyes darted upwards and met the calm, open gaze.

'Patient exemplifies agitation when the amputation was suggested. Treatment will be further recommended at a later date.'

Sighing softly, Sakura placed down his medical file, unsure of what to make of this outcome. Fingers fidgeting with the hem of her clothes, the last words she read on the medical chart echoed dimly in her mind.

'With further options presented, Sharingan eye is sewn shut and will not be removed.'

(On a hidden medical chart stored in the deepest bowels of the rebuilding Konoha, an additional crimson note was marked on the records.

'…Argued against removal of Sharingan, noted for sentimental value. Reasoned importance. Threatened bodily harm, death, to self. No one present refuted his judgement. Sharingan eye will not be amputated; secondary option is instated.')

Sakura approached the injured man's bedside, each step marked with hesitancy, and she weakly questioned him, "How…How are you, Kakashi-sensei?"

"Hmn…" One pale grey and one sewn shut, he regarded her carefully before his seeing eye curled agreeably. "I'm alright. Though, the sheets are a bit too starchy and making me rash along the arms…"

"Ah-I'll be sure to tell the nurses that…" A lengthy pause situated itself and the other occupant of the room made no move to disperse it. Sakura finally brushed back pink hair, agitated. "…But…How _are_ you?" Worrying her lip, she gestured rapidly. "You can't be-It's just…This isn't…This isn't fair…" She trailed off, eyes rimmed with frustration as she frowned almost pleadingly at the man.

And still, he seemed to only stare at her intently. Judgement.

The medic-nin averted her gaze then when she felt the tell-tale prickle behind her eyes. She whispered softly, "…I'm…I'm just so_ sorry_, Kakashi-sensei."

On the one hand she was thrilled that he was alive; on the other hand, she knew that her sensei had been a ninja most of his life, protecting the village with everything he had. To not be a shinobi upholding the Will of Fire ever again…

…It seemed a fate far more cruel. How can he carry on like this…?

And it appeared he knew what she was thinking because he _looked_ at her and gave her a cryptic (or maybe not-so-cryptic) answer, "Remember. Life is always fair, Sakura. It only depends on how you look at it." He even had the gall to chuckle. "In fact, I'm surprised I didn't die."

"I…I see." But she didn't understand him, not yet, and he knew she wasn't ready – too naive in the face of what he has experienced throughout his lifetime.

Even so, there was a lull of satisfaction, and Sakura could almost feel it. With a tired shuffle, the ex-ninja repeated – too steely and firm, "I'm alright."

She bobbed her head hollowly. "I know…" A lie. Stifling silence. "I-I need to see the other patients. I'll visit you later."

"Okay."

"Rest well sensei."

A dismissal. "Make sure you do too, Sakura."

They both knew she wouldn't be resting any time soon, not when there were so many injured and dying left to tend. But nevertheless she responded quietly, "…I will."

When she turned away, she missed the imperceptible curling of fingers and the vacant, weary stare directed out the window. Konoha's ruin resounded strongly within him as the vultures in the sky cried.

--

**TBC**

**A/N: **Heh. I know I'm supposed to be on hiatus but let me defend myself! I actually wrote this part out back near the beginning of January (when my Naruto muse went vicious and was super tenacious…). And today, I was thinking to myself, well, I _am_ on hiatus for the next 2 months…What if the manga decides to resolve itself and this plot becomes null and void?

By all means, this isn't complete yet but I decided to post it anyway (Think of it like a…placeholder of sorts). I'll write the rest of this idea when I have time because really, do you think this is all I have to say about the whole Kakashi-damnyouKishimoto issue? :)

On a side note, I find it interesting how most of fandom sees the clear defined line of life and death – the extremes where he either comes back 100 percent healthy or is dead as a doornail. Kind of like black and white but no grey.

Let this be grey.

~Phoenyxx


End file.
